Half the time... i don't know what World i'm walking in. I mean, i know but i don't... Am i here, am i not. Do you see me or am i just floating around but the thing is, being invisible grants you a type of free that is hard to be put in words. Sometimes i want to ask people "yo! are you seeing this shit?" but it is not for them if they aren't am i even to be talking about it... That is the real question. I have in a painting so why not in words... is it because words make things clear? or do they just muddle things in a far different way, everything seems to be a conflict but why? The dilemma... and i know why part of the conflict is there. It will be dealt with sooner than later.
I asked a friend Crockett, "what happens if you get addicted to the unknown?" and his reaction was well, not for me to share for you weren't there. But after that convo, i saw a look in his eyes, and i was like "Word, I See You!"
I did comedy tonight, it has been some time... but before that, the day started with picking up dog shit. Not my favorite thing to do nor the worst thing i have done. The worst working jobs that i know i am wasting away... the day started with a message from an artist... Bruce Leroy, from the name you think it was a nigga... (i'll leave you hanging, is race important) but he told me about the east la art walk, all i was gonna do was sit on my ass and think about shit. The table and all the art was already in the car so i just went... i checked it out. it was cool, but it was not the place for me to be... Compton, Watts and Leimert Park were calling., the plan was to drive by Leimert Park see how it was then go to Compton to check out the popup... then go chill at the Watts Towers. But That did not happen.... i stayed in Leimert Park.
I parked, and i was crutching down the street and this dude looked at me and he said something about "i am excited for you to heal! and with what you're doing is a great rehab." But there was something in his eyes... I've seen it before. And i wonder if anyone else saw it. if not, it wasn't for them to see... i have seen this look in a few peoples eyes and all i can say is "Word! I see you!" i checked out a little bit of the scene, not as much as i should have, you know cause crutches ain't exactly the way to be getting around.
Back at the car i started setting up my art and this dude rode by on a bike and looked at the art then me and said "drive slow homie" and i said "always" just the natural response, or programmed response... now isn't that a mind fuck, a programmed response...
"hi, how are you?"
"i am good"
Now are you really good or is that the programming... but i thought about it, Slow down, the slow down... even when the ankle happened i thought cool, i get to slow down. But will i... I do not have a choice.... The fuck am i rushing for anyway... when you're fucking, having sex, making love... are you in a rush? nope, so why rush the process... why rush this. That's stupid, dumb as fuck, and i can say i have been dumb as fuck. Even though i learn from most of my mistakes, some are just fun making, so is it truly a mistake then. "Drive slow homie"
Are You Free?